Older, Wiser & Freer

The change 6 Powerful Steps

Following a date with my faithful and constant companion, otherwise known as a camera.  Visiting what started its life many years ago as a weekend retreat I am able to share with you this image.

I was drawn to take a photograph of the American Slave Statue because for a brief moment it prompted a memory of the restrictions forced on me by society as a young girl.

“Girls are seen and not heard” and “girls should only speak when spoken to” are recorded and replayed over and over loudly, ringing in my ears like church bells with full force to make sure I’m listening and giving these statements my full attention.

Each word doing a great job of making sure I conform and remain obedient to the expectations of what it means to be

a good daughter,

a good employee,

a good wife,

a good mother etc – Quiet, invisible, non-confronting and voiceless.



The ‘Crazy Cat Lady’ showed up unannounced with way too much to say for herself and demanding to do what the hell she likes, whenever she likes.

Crazy creative things like doodling, painting, personal development workshops, day dreaming, meeting old and new friends for lunch, nurturing plants, long woodland walks, reading for hours on end and writing crap about crap and thoroughly enjoying it all.

Yes, I know, how dare she!

freedom is a positive symptom of the change

and one I value highly.

The hand chains also reminded me of my own mental chains that kept me from living a life without fear or imposed limits.

Every negative thought an untruth and yet for the first 50 years of my life I believed these lies wholeheartedly and as if my life depended upon it.

Suddenly, out of nowhere and without warning, my worldview changed.

The landscape of my life became a foreign land, my ‘norms’ both imposed and imagined started to make me feel pinned down.

Breathless and gasping.

That’s when I decided to stop fighting to hang on to what has now passed (my old life…the younger me) and embrace the new road ahead.

To step into the power of what some enlightened women call the Crone (the Crone is a symbol of wisdom; a wise and confident spirit).

Hello and welcome to the older, wiser and freer me.

Reflecting upon this image now, makes me feel small minded and selfish because the American Slave was lawfully denied, restricted and abused in the most inhumane way.

I imagine her most dominant thoughts were about freedom and her every day experience lived in REAL stomach churning fear.

My first experience of oppression now feels inconsequential and petty.

And sharing my original thoughts, exteremly inadequate in comparison to the narrative of the American Slave.

But getting back to the point of this post (my heart heavy with sadness from the realisation that women around the world are still being treated very badly and going through unimaginable suffering).

It’s so important to liberate ourselves from all those things that hold us back and shake off the fake shackles for good as well as welcome the changes ahead with open arms.

Hands up,

all women who no longer want to be chained up or held down by the expectations and standards of others. In the next stage of our life, lets sing and dance all the way to the end in true [insert your name] style.

Demonstrating that its okay to be a ‘Crazy Cat Lady’ and rock out your own ‘Style’ in any way you choose.



Care to share! we love to hear about your experiences.



The Change

 “Now I really appreciate my maturity as a woman. My depth of spirit and soul and my understanding of who I am and what’s important to me” – Elle Macpherson (52)

This change of life malarkey has got me into some deep thinking about who I am and what am I here for! I have been on a bit of a self-discovering journey lately and the further I travel along the lands of adventure, the more I enjoy my wayward trek into the unknown.

It’s turning into the tale of the good, the bad and the ugly.

So far, I have been down the path of awakening, shock and bewilderment.

When did I get so old?


When? And how did that happen?

The Good

Aside from all the physical changes forced on me, it’s the internal changes that have me questioning just about every area of my life. The spiritual part of me begs for attention similar to the way a toddler pleads for their favorite toy and it’s nowhere to be found. Only louder and with a lot more whining and wailing! Both unable to accept the words no, not now or later.


[Pre]menopause, so far has been a bit of a game changer in every sense of the word. I am literally changing from the inside out. I see things differently, I feel things differently and I am much more in tune with my happy vibe.

The Bad

As I navigate my way through this strange thing called [pre]menopause, I have chosen the name “Crazy Cat Lady” (with some thought, I’m sure I could come up with a better name but I’m sticking with it for now) to describe my nonsensical and rebellious side.

By the way I don’t own cats of any kind and have no plans to either.


No offense to all the [real] Crazy Cat Lady’s out there, this is just my way of discussing the subject in a light-hearted humorous way (more for my own amusement but there is a genuine need for me to process some of what’s happening both internally and externally). I hope by sharing her victories, temporary roadblocks and setbacks this will help other women who find themselves exploring new territory on the [pre]menopause path.

The Ugly

My ‘Crazy Cat Lady’ moments make me smile and laugh out loud on a good day and shake my head in total disbelief on a not-so-good day.

These moments are usually when I do something ‘Deborah’ style. Following many conversations and the occasional colourful and carefully worded debate on alternative methods of approaching Menopause. I have my daughter Kristie to thank for pointing out to me that I do indeed have a style of my own.

For example, ignoring directions to a known conventional route in search of undiscovered roads and highways and writing about my experiences during the change of life. This has the potential to get very messy (ugly) at different stages because I have no idea where my [pre]menopause adventure will take me next.

To climb the blue mountains of thinning hair?

Explore the volcanic islands of memory loss?

Swim the great lakes of hot flushes?

More information on [pre]menopause


Please post your comment below.

Care to share! we love to hear about your experiences.


Newborn – Wall hART
Newborn – Wall hART
Newborn – Wall hART
Newborn – Wall hART
Newborn – Wall hART
Newborn – Wall hArt
Newborn – Wall hART
Newborn – Wall hART
Newborn – Wall hART
Newborn – Wall hART
Newborn – Wall hART
Newborn – Wall hART